Giving Yourself a Family Caregiver Reality Check

Family Caregivers in Sudbury MA

In your family caregiver role it is easy to get overwhelmed and feel like you do not know which direction to turn. You may feel like you have taken on too much and do not know how you are going to handle it all, or like you are not putting forth the amount of effort that your parents deserve. You may feel this even more intensely if you are a part of the sandwich generation, caring for your parents as well as raising your children. When you start to feel overwhelmed and stressed, taking a moment to have a reality check can help you to get your role back into perspective and feel more confident about your ability to handle your responsibilities effectively and efficiently.

Use these tips to have a family caregiver reality check:

• Be realistic. At the beginning of your care journey it is easy to feel like this arrangement is only temporary and your parents are sure to overcome whatever challenges they are facing so that they can go back to the independent, active, and engaged lives that you are accustomed to them having. While you are having your reality check it is important that you be realistic about the possibility that you are going to be in this care relationship for a considerable amount of time. Just getting to this point in your mind can help you to feel more in control and less anxious about the experience.
• Relinquish control. You do not have to be in control of everything. That may be a difficult concept for you to accept, but it is critical for you to let go of your need to be in control of every aspect of your parents’ lives. You cannot control what they are going through, their future needs, or how they will respond to your care. You can only control how you care for them and how you handle difficult situations that arise.
• Know your limits. When you are first getting started on your care journey with your parents, you might feel like you could do absolutely anything that they might need. When you begin your care efforts, however, you might find that there are some things that you simply do not feel comfortable doing, or that you are not capable of handling successfully, safely, or healthily. Pushing yourself past these limits can put you under serious stress, diminish your relationship with your aging parents, and even put you at risk of health and safety consequences. Give yourself a moment to reconnect with these limits and why you have them. While you are identifying what you may not be able to handle, however, also be sure that you are reminding yourself of the things that you do accomplish in your care journey and how well you handle them for your loved ones. Instead of focusing just on the extra help that you will need and what you feel like you are not doing, focus on all of the effort that you do put forth and what you are able to do on a daily basis.

Once you have completed a family caregiver reality check, you will probably realize that you need some help in order to provide all of your loved one’s needs while still maintaining your own health and personal life. Consider bringing in a non-medical caregiver to help reduce the level of stress put upon your time and energy, while offering your senior parent the support they need to age in place.

Source
https://www.caregiver.org/special-issues/caregiver-health