How Can Caring for an Elderly Parent Damage the Relationship?

Elder Care in Clayton, NC – February is Relationship Wellness Month

Nobody really wants to hurt their relationship with a loved one, but the moment you begin caring for an aging parent or grandparent, you can run the risk of doing this very thing.

Most people avoid the topic of home care for the elderly simply because they either feel guilty if they don’t care for their loved one or have various myths and misconceptions about this type of care and assistance.

February is Relationship Wellness Month and it’s important to talk about how being a caregiver for a family member can actually cause damage to the relationship over time.

Differences in viewpoints.

One of the most common problems that arise between an aging parent and their adult child who is taking care of them is a difference in opinion or viewpoint. The adult child is focused on ensuring their loved one’s safety at home. The elderly individual may want to take part in various activities, do certain things, travel, or even go to the store.

If the family caregiver is telling the elderly person what to do, what not to do, what to avoid, or things they shouldn’t even think about doing, this can create tension in the relationship. Being so focused on securing the elderly individual and ensuring their safety can create tunnel vision, not allowing that person to see the potential harm they are causing their loved one.

It’s similar to the situation of the first time parent being obsessively over-protective of their child. Children need to be encouraged to explore and that will likely lead to scrapes, bumps, and certain injuries. Smothering a person because you’re too concerned about their safety can be damaging. When it’s an elderly individual who has been independent for most of their life, it can create tension.

It can also be incredibly difficult to recognize the tension that begins to build in the relationship, especially if it’s gradual and takes place over several weeks or months. However, when the family caregiver is stressed, anxious, and completely frustrated because they feel their elderly loved one doesn’t appreciate what they do or isn’t listening to them, that can be a strong indicator that  non-medical in-home care is the better option.

In fact, experienced non-medical caregivers can help keep your loved one safe while also encouraging them to take part in activities they enjoy, which can have numerous emotional benefits as well.

The articles posted on this blog are provided for general information and discussion purposes only.  These articles are not intended to suggest anything with respect to the operations or services of this office.